Everyone talks about mama’s boys and daddy’s girls, but what about the special and unique relationship between moms and daughters? It truly is one of the strongest bonds of all. Let’s talk about why.
The unbreakable bond between moms and daughters
There’s a beautiful quote by a poet named Signe Hammer that goes, “Mothers of daughters are daughters of mothers and have remained so, in circles joined to circles, since time began.”
In other words, we are part of an unbroken chain going all the way back to the very beginning of humankind. Generations upon generations of mothers passing down the secrets of life, love and what it means to be a woman have forged those circles into a tungsten chain (the strongest metal on earth, and yes, I had to look it up).
Now, don’t get me wrong. Our bond with our sons is just as strong. It’s just…different. We can love our kids equally without loving them exactly the same way. Our sons wrap us around their little fingers and show us what it is like to be someone’s first love.
Our daughters, on the other hand, are like windows into our past as much as we are windows into their future. We can relate to them on a level that we can’t with our sons because we’ve experienced everything that they’re going through. Moms know what it’s like to hear things like, “girls can’t do that,” to be the first (or last) to go through puberty in our class, to fall in love and have our hearts broken for the first time, to obsess over finding the perfect prom dress.
We understand each other like no one else can
In other words, we understand each other on a deep, cellular level in a way that we can never understand our sons. Sometimes, that can lead to some interesting situations! Let’s be honest, moms and daughters definitely clash more than moms and sons. When two people are so completely alike, clashes are bound to happen.
The beautiful thing about those clashes, though, is that they only strengthen our bonds with our daughters. We come through those awkward teen years and emerge as something so much more than just a mom and her daughter. We become friends. No, more than that. We become best friends.
Mom goes from the woman you shut out of your room while screaming “I need my privacy!” to the first person you call when you need advice. From the person who sees the whites of your eyes more than anyone as you constantly roll them at her to the first person who sees the tears in them when you break up with your “true love.”
Even science agrees that moms and daughters have a unique bond
Did you know that even science agrees that moms and daughters have a unique bond? In a study published in the Journal of Neuroscience, scientists explained the deep emotional connection between mothers and daughters. While the article is super heavy on science jargon, Julie Scagell of Scary Mommy does a good job of explaining it in lay terms.
Basically, it all comes down to how our brains process emotions. Scientists found that the part of our brain that processes them is more similar in moms and daughters than any other combination (like moms and sons or fathers and daughters). While it helps explain why certain conditions like panic disorder and depression so easily passes from mom to daughter, it also demonstrates what I was talking about above- how very alike moms and daughters are to each other.
Mothers and daughters are a force of nature
I’ll leave you with one last beautiful quote about the bond between moms and daughters. This one comes from Melia Keeton-Digby and says, ““Mothers and daughters together are a powerful force to be reckoned with.” As long as we have mom by our sides- or in our hearts if she can’t be there physically- we’re unstoppable.
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